Thursday, February 03, 2005

i feel human again

i got the internet yesterday and i'm back online...yee hah! so i've done a fair share of tactics in my time off. hopefully i'll be peaking by the time i get to the tournament. i borrowed The Italian Gambit off of Aaron Clinton last weekend because it had some 2. ...d6 3.Bb5+, 2. ...Nc6 3.Bb5 lines v. the Sicilian in it. the book is basically a load of crap. the "miami variation" that the author (who isn't jude acers btw, simply a class player) invented is just a trappy line in the italian game (no doubt dangerous) that he played a bunch of correspondence games v. acers in which he was allowed to use books, computers, etc. and acers was just using his brain and he won a couple games against him. the first part of the book is on the italian gambit that this guy invented and the second part is a repetoire book for 1.e4. in addition to those sicilian lines (which had some lovely games including this one) Browne-Quinteros they had an interesting line v. the Pirc

1.e4 d6 2.d4 Nf6 3.Nc3 g6 4.f4 Bg7 5.e5!? dxe5 6.dxe5 Qxd1+ 7.Kxd1 Ng4

the novelty 5.e5 was originally played by David Bronstein and isn't that bad. i'm looking to sit down and focus for a long time at this tournament...and this takes black out of book and if he's going to beat me, he's going to have to work at it...similar to the exchange lopez.

i'm always looking for something v. 1.d4 and in a combination of the Georgia Chess and Kevin Spraggett i stumbled onto the Clarendon Court opening.

1.d4 c5 2.d5 f5?!

is it as ugly as it looks? likely, but if it stops me from getting A45s it may be worth it. don't look for this at kitchener, but maybe afterwards. i was also thinking about playing the cambridge springs...we'll have to see.

btw, IM Michael Schleifer whipped out his dong at a tournament in Ottawa and pissed on the chessboard...from (this is too good not to save for history :) )

This shocking occurrence took place during the third round of last weekend's RA Winter Open...

IM Micheal Schleifer, who's birthday it was weekend last, drank and drank and drank a huge amount a beer (kudos to him), in fact he was cut off from consuming even more beer in the RA Centre Field House.

And then some friend of his bought Michael yet another pitcher of beer all to be consumed before the start of round three of the RA Winter Open!!

The IM made it on time to his game, and then proceeded to pass out, head on hands at the board.

A cell phone rang (which is something else all together) which startled IM Michael Schleifer to awake.

Immediately after awakening he stood up, unzipped his pants, pulled out his manhood, and urinated all over the table, the chess pieces and board, and on the floor. His opponent was transfixed in complete shock.

Fortunately his side of the table had him with his back to the whole room, except for those on either side of him, boards 1 and 3.

Those who could see or hear the urine hitting the paper board and pieces, table, and the floor are still very disgusted.

Security was called, Michael in complete shock was carried from the playing hall.

Ok, so what should be done about this very offensive act???

There are other instances of a IM urinating while SITTING at the board, but none to reference a STANDING and urinating ON the board.

The other instance was in a Canadian championship and nothing was made of it. Although Hergott offered a very quick draw, the incident received only gossip. "

too funny...the other was bryon nickoloff i believe

1 comment:

Craig said...

on the Toronto Star today, there was an article on the "open fly gambit" with reference to the OCC site...i guess bad publicity is better than no publicity? ;)

Beery chess whiz unzips new offence
Drunken Master adjusts fly for opening gambit
Sanctions pondered against apologetic playerGLEN COLBOURN
It is a game ... typically played ... at a ... sedate ... pace. A single move can take half an hour. Talking is forbidden. Drama occurs imperceptibly, like the rising of a tide. A malfunctioning time clock counts as unexpected excitement. Etiquette and sportsmanship generally rule.

Generally. Not always.

The Canadian chess community has been buzzing over the strange saga of the drunken International Master.

Drunk is only the half of it.

According to a report posted on (but since bumped off) the Ottawa Chess Club bulletin board, one of Canada's top players created a rare spectacle at the RA Winter Open tournament in January.

Michael Schleifer "drank a huge amount a (sic) beer" while celebrating his birthday before Round 3 of the Ottawa event, wrote Neil James Frarey, president of the Eastern Ontario Chess Association. He was cut off but a friend bought the player more beer before the start of his next game.

"The IM made it on time to his game, and then proceeded to pass out, head on hands at the board."

He was startled awake by a ringing cellphone.

"Immediately after awakening he stood up, unzipped his pants, pulled out his manhood, and urinated all over the table, the chess pieces and board, and on the floor. His opponent was transfixed in complete shock," the report said.

Schleifer has since sent letters of apology to local organizers and to the Chess Federation of Canada, which is pondering sanctions.

What is shocking is not just the bizarre nature of the incident — which one bulletin board respondent dubbed "The Open Fly Gambit" — but the glimpse it provides into the world of chess masters behaving badly.

It is also providing fertile fodder for another rarity — chess humour.

"This brings a new meaning to `elimination round,'" commented one message-writer.

"Certainly we can expect ... to have an increase in the sale of plastic (i.e. washable) boards and plastic pieces," wrote Kevin Spraggett, Canada's top-ranked Grandmaster.

The player's unexpected opening manoeuvre threatens to bring the game some of the attention normally accorded to the bad boys of mainstream sports.

(Chess is considered a sport by some and has been formally recognized by the International Olympic Committee.)

Though it happened at a modest tournament in Ottawa, the incident has been noted on international chess websites and, says the Portugal-based Spraggett, discussed at European tournaments.

"It was so out of character and so astonishing," says veteran chess columnist Lawrence Day, the Canadian champion in 1991 and an International Master (one step below Grandmaster) since 1972.

"You go 10,000 chess games, everything is normal and peaceful like church, and then every now and then something happens and you notice. In my whole life, and that's like 3,000 tournaments, I've witnessed one fight."

That was in 1981 in New York. Two Grandmasters were playing other opponents on adjacent boards when one broke the no-talking rule.

Day remembers the Grandmaster imitating Robert De Niro's character from Taxi Driver: "`What are you looking at?' he says with a Bronx accent like Travis Bickle. This Hungarian Grandmaster replies: `What are you looking at?' And the first guy says: `Do you want to step outside?'

"This is a quaint chess club in New York with a little garden in the back yard, about 20 square yards," continues Day.

"So these two guys go out to the garden and all the players in the tournament, looking at each other, wonder what's going on. Then they all, almost simultaneously, agreed to draws and left."

Day never did learn what set off the quarrel.

But bizarre behaviour is not unheard of in championship chess.

"Chess players are eccentric at the top level," says Robert Hamilton, a top-25 player in Canada recognized by the world chess governing body as a Master.

"These are people who grow up spending a great deal of their life inside of something that's 18 inches by 18 inches."

In fact, some of the game's most famous players have built their reputations, in part, on their antics. Mikhail Chigorin took open bottles of brandy to his 1889 world title match against Wilhelm Steinitz, prompting Steinitz to bring champagne. Steinitz won.

At the 1978 world championship, organizers reportedly had to install a board under the table so that fierce rivals Anatoly Karpov and Viktor Korchnoi couldn't kick each other.

And then there's Bobby Fischer, whose peerless play was trumped only by his public rants — "Is it against the law to kill a reporter?" he once asked.

"Chess players are oddballs in many ways," says Spraggett, who recalls shocking a friend when he took him into a chess club in Montreal about 15 years ago.

"He didn't know too much about chess and I was showing him around the club. All of the sudden we came across this guy who was sleeping underneath one of the tables. It was very embarrassing because he was the Canadian champion."

Despite the oddities, most competitions are, as Day points out, pedestrian affairs.

For some chess lovers that means Ottawa's "Open Fly Gambit" is a cause for celebration.

Wrote one on the Ottawa Chess Club bulletin board:

"Thanks for finally showing us that a chess tournament isn't just full of uptight nerds with no sense of humour!"